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donkey punch
Click for full sized poster

Donkey Punch

Starring Robert Boulter, Sian Breckin, Tom Burke, Nichola Burley, Julianne Morris, Jay Taylor and Jamie Winstone
Screenplay by Oliver Blackburn and David Bloom
Directed by Oliver Blackburn
website: www.donkeypunchmovie.co.uk

IN SHORT: A brutal, hardcore thriller. [Not Rated. 110 minutes]

Bestest friends Kim (Jaime Winstone), Tammi (Nichola Burley) and Lisa (Sian Breckin), all from the blue collar factory town of Leeds, in England, are on vacation in sunny Majorca, Spain. It's a girl's week away from the grey: Tammi has just had her heart broke and this trip is a much needed recuperation of sun, swimming, drinking, dancing, flirting but nothing mire -- at least at first. Available young men on the prowl, of course,  find them. This trio is comprised of at least one tough talking, lower class sounding drug dealer, Bluey (Tom Burke); cleaner University types Marcus (Jay Taylor) and Josh (Julian Morris) who have spent the summer crewing a yacht for some incredibly rich dude who has already returned home. Set to take the yacht back to the UK the next day, the three convince the girls to come aboard "just for a drink" and to head out to sea to watch the sun go down. There is a fourth lad on board, Josh's older brother Sean (Robert Boulter), who is temporarily in charge of the yacht. He's also odd man out.

More important, the yacht must be out at sea before it can unleash the power of its massive disco sound system and the real partying can begin. So far Donkey Punch is pretty standard. Youth. Horny youth. Loud music to dance to. Flirting on the dance floor. Pheremones raging. A huge yacht to explore and of course tabs of Ecstasy and other illegal drugs -- in this case a smokeable concoction  called "Russian Ice" -- and the usual boastful talk about incredibly strange sexual antics and positions, one of which is the "Donkey Punch" of the title.

As explained to the ladies (and we're cleaning it up), The Donkey Punch involves a second male whose job it is to hit the first male in the back of the head at the, uh, ultimate moment. What's in it for the lady? Well, let's put it this way. The description is a lie. When the ecstasy etc kicks in and the action moves to the staterooms below decks, things get down and dirty. We the viewing audience get to see what a Donkey Punch is, in all its murderous glory.

We won't say the death on screen was a premeditated decision. We will allow that drug enhanced idiot kids are prone to do drug enhanced idiot things. But what's done is done and, once the Punch is deliverd the film becomes a tense thriller about death and guilt and coverup and alliances and revenge. It is a glue you to the seat story to see who survives the night.

We will be specific here: the sex is close to hardcore. The violent moments are quite intense but Donkey Punch is no slice n dice horrowshow. It is a hardcore thriller in just about every sense of the phrase "hardcore" (and we're going to stop over using said phrase right now. Promise) and as the film progresses, alliances are made, alibis are formulated, betrayals fly left and right. Kind of like Survivor on the high seas, except that this particular "game" is done in a reasonable amount of time and, if you get pulled in, it ain't no game.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Ten Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price to Donkey Punch, he would have paid . . .

$6.00

Enough sex and violence that it should thrill the Gen-Y crowd, as long as you can get through the Brit accents, which are kinda thick.

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