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Starring Casey Affleck and Matt Damon
Screenplay by Casey Affleck, Matt Damon and Gus Van Sant
Directed by Gus Van Sant
no website

IN SHORT: Feh. [Rated R for Language. 103 minutes]

Two dolts go into the mountains
Two dolts go into the mountains
Two dolts go into the mountains
to have a little walk.

The mountains turn to desert
They didn't bring a canteen
They didn't bring a compass
And that is why they're lost. Oh .....

Two dolts go into the mountains
Two dolts go into the mountains
Two dolts go into the mountains
to walk a little more.

And walk a little more!
and walk a little more!
Two dolts go into the mountains
to walk a little more.

While they were in the mountains, they paused...

"How do you think the hike's going so far?" says one to the other.

"Pretty good," comes the response, which is pretty close to fifty per cent of the dialog in the entirety of a film that took three people to write. Then, big surprise here people, they walked some more.

The critics prayed for credits
The critics prayed for credits
The critics prayed for credits
and ran the hell away.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Ten Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price to Gerry, he would have paid . . .


Don't waste your time or dollars. We've already wasted too much time on this nonsense.

amazon com link Click to buy films by Gus Van Sant
Click to buy films starring Matt Damon
Click to buy films starring Casey Affleck

The Cranky Critic website is Copyright © 1995  -  2017  by Chuck Schwartz. Articles by Paul Fischer are Copyright © 1999 - 2006 Paul Fischer. All images, unless otherwise noted, are property of,©, ®, their respective studios and are used by permission. All Rights Reserved. Not to be used or copied for any commercial purpose. Academy Award(s) and Oscar®(s) are registered trademarks and service marks of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.