cranky home
Reviews since 1993:   A-E     F-N      O-Z    Posters       Who We Are and Why We Do What We Do         Search the Site

Your Donations support the Site

amazon.gif
Top Selling DVD     Books

BLU-RAY DVDs:
50 Shades of Grey
Exodus Gods and Kings
Grand Budapest Hotel
Imitation Game, The
Into the Woods

Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit
Robocop
Selma
Theory of Everything
Ride Along
We're the Millers
The Great Gatsby
Akira
Avatar
The Avengers
Amazing Spider-Man
Girl w/ Dragon Tattoo
Dark Knight Trilogy
World War Z
Happy Feet 2
Iton Man 3 combo
Batman Begins
Dark Knight
Fifth Element
The Hangover
Hunger Games
James Bond 11 disc coll.
Lord of the Rings trilogy
Mission Impossible GP
Sherlock Holmes AGOS
Singing in the Rain
Snow White Huntsman
Star Trek Into Darkness combo
Star Wars Saga
21 Jump Street
Ultimate Matrix coll
X-Men First Class
X-Men Trilogy
X-Men Wolverine

 BLU-Ray for Family DVDs 
Alice in Wonderland (2010)
Bambi
A Bug's Life
Cars
Chronicles of Narnia set
Coraline
Ghostbusters
Harry Potter 1-8 collection
Iron Man 2 combo
Kung Fu Panda
Lord of the Rings Trilogy Pinocchio
Pirates of Caribbean trilogy
Pixar short films
Ratatouille
Rio
Shrek the Whole Story
Sleeping Beauty
The Smurfs
combo
Snow White & 7 Dwarfs
Star Trek motion pictures set
Star Trek TNG Season One
Star Wars Saga (1-6)
Toy Story combo
Toy Story 2 combo
Toy Story 3 combo
Wall-E SE

OFCS

Search engine by FreeFind
Click to add search to YOUR web site!
click to search site

 DISNEY PIXAR DVDs
Alice in Wonderland
Bambi
Beauty and the Beast
Bolt
Cinderella
Coraline
E.T.
Kung Fu Panda
The Lion King
Mary Poppins 45th LE
Pinocchio
Princess Mononoke
Ratatouille
Rio 
Shrek the Whole Story
Simpsons Movie
Spider-Man Trilogy
Spirited Away
Star Trek movies set
Star Trek TOS (TV)
ST:TNG complete tv set
Star Wars Trilogy (1-3)
Star Wars Trilogy (4-6)
Toy Story DVD combo
Toy Story 2 DVD combo
Toy Story 3 DVD combo
Wallace and Gromit
Wall-E SE

Buy Movie collectibles
TV/Movie Collectibles

movie review query engine

NY film critics online

Privacy Policy

 

Final Destination

Rated [R]
Starring Devon Sawa
Screenplay by Glen Morgan, James Wong and Jeffrey Reddick; story by Jeffrey Riddick
Directed by James Wong
website: www.deathiscoming.com

IN SHORT: Rube Goldberg makes a scareflick

A planeload of high school students on a field trip to France. A nervous kidlet, Alex Browning (Devon Sawa) who has a vision of a horrific plane crash that terrifies him so that he gets kicked off the plane. Four others students and one teacher get knocked off the boarding list as well, for other reasons. The plane crashes, just as Alex had forseen. Death, force that it is, comes calling for the six who got left behind in Final Destination, a scareflick so painflully bad that viewing it will convince you that suicide should be legalized in all fifty states. You won't be angry enough to want to go out and kill the filmmakers, 'cuz you'll want to waste yourself for wasting your cash money.

It's not that the idea isn't a good one. It probably sounded great in the pitch meeting, since it had been developing in the mind of Jeffrey Riddick since he was 14 years old and decided he wanted to write horror movies like A Nightmare on Elm Street. The problem is that the script, finished by Glen Morgan and James Wong, goes to such lengths to set up an unbelievable sequence of coincidences that lead to the snuffing of each survivor student that you don't believe 'em -- especially since the first one starts as something really cool but ultimately comes up so damn short of a scare. An experienced director might have looked at the storyboards and seen what didn't make sense; he may have known how to make the deaths visually arresting. But director James Wong does neither and, having co-written the script, doesn't step back to say "Whoa..."

Cranky felt like he had seen all this before. Toonhead that he is, the name of cartoonist Rube Goldberg came to mind. Goldberg who made his fame by creating cartoons of over-elaborate machines created to do simple things. Here's one example, and it's a simple one. More can be found at www.rubegoldberg.com. Each death in this flick plays out like one of Rube's machines, and none of 'em are as entertaining. Beyond that, the story plummets into the realm of unbelieveability when Alex figures out a "reason" and an "order" for who is going to die and when. Does he tell the cops? No. Does he show up at each scene to try to stop it? Yes. Do the cops find him there and figure he's a serial killer? Not for a second.

An unknown cast. First time creators. Major flame out. Final Destination is too painful to write anything else about. Avoid the flight at all costs.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Eight Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price to Final Destination, he would have paid...

$1.00

'cuz the plane crash, premonition that it was, was gangbusters. Find someone to rent it for you.

Click to buy films by Alan Parker
Click to buy films starring Emily Watson
Click to buy films starring Robert Carlyle
Click Here!

The Cranky Critic website is Copyright © 1995  -  2017  by Chuck Schwartz. Articles by Paul Fischer are Copyright © 1999 - 2006 Paul Fischer. All images, unless otherwise noted, are property of,©, ®, their respective studios and are used by permission. All Rights Reserved. Not to be used or copied for any commercial purpose. Academy Award(s) and Oscar®(s) are registered trademarks and service marks of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.