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The Locusts
Starring Kate Capshaw, Jeremy Davies,
Vince Vaughn and Ashley Judd
Written and Directed by John Patrick Kelley

IN SHORT: zzz.

Being released in a limited run is The Locusts, nearly two hours of one tepid story and a hidden family secret that was so well hidden, not even the audience gave a damn when it was revealed.

Mrs. Potts (Kate Capshaw) is a woman said to "eat city boys for breakfast" which is in addition to her chain smoking and bourbon guzzling ways. Her son Flyboy, given name Joseph, (Jeremy Davies) is named after his uncle, a flyer who went down in the war. He keeps a 20 year old bull named Jim as a pet. He was institutionalized for 8 years and doesn't talk or interact with anyone. The drifter passing through, Clay Hewitt (Vince Vaughn) means to change that. Consider it his good Samaritan deed of the day, in reparation for other lives he may have destroyed elsewhere. While Clay tries to bring Flyboy into the real world, a local gal (Ashley Judd) is luring him into hers.

The Locusts is a movie which passes itself off like the 1958 Kansas / Missouri that it's set in. It takes a *long* time to get to the earth shattering secret saved for the last scenes. Problem is, there is no hint that there is an earth shattering secret coming. When it does arrive, no one care.

Two hours is a very long time to develop one story. The few substories which begin and quickly go nowhere include Joel (Daniel Meyer), Kitty's jealous boyfriend (who's also servicing Mrs. Potts) have no follow up power. The romance between Kitty (Judd) and Clay is pitifully developed.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Eight Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price for The Locusts, he would have paid . . .

$1.00

One hot sex scene and a couple of brooding numbers just doesn't do it for yours truly. But hot is hot.

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