Cranky Critic® Movie Reviews: Feeling Minnesota

Feeling Minnesota

Starring Keanu Reeves, Cameron Diaz, Vincent D'Onofrio,
Dan Aykroyd, Tuesday Weld, and Levon Helm
Written and Directed by Steven Baigelman

Somewhere out in the creative ozone this thought drifted into the head of a writer (though I can't blame writer/director Steven Baigelman, 'cuz I'd be wrong and get sued) . . . "What if the Three Stooges had guns? And what if one of 'em was a woman?" Which is Feeling Minnesota in summary.

First time filmmaker Baigelman says the film was inspired by a song by Soundgarden, who were so honored that they contributed not one song to the thing. It is the story of two brothers who genuinely, sincerely and honestly don't like each other at all. When they were kids it was a physical dislike -- they threw rocks at each other, the bigger one beat up on the smaller one. The usual stuff.

Twenty years later Sam (Vincent D'Onofrio), the big one, is a blue collar accountant who hasn't seen his younger brother in 20 years. That's because he was taken away when the parental units broke up, and, as an adult, Jjaks (Keanu Reeves) is a jailbird without enough sense and/or money to correct the typographical error that saddled him with such a silly name to begin with.

The occasion that brings them together is the wedding of the elder to a drop-and-roll fiery blonde named Freddie (Cameron Diaz). For her, it's get-married-or-else. Freddie has allegedly ripped off "Red" (Delroy Lindo) for ten grand. Red and his, um, associates have inflicted all sorts of physical abuse on the frail girl (including tattooing the word "slut" on her arm. Freddie would rather be a showgirl in Vegas.

So, at the behest of mom (Tuesday Weld), Keanu shows up for the wedding. Within an hour or so he and his brand-spanking-new sis-in-law are in the bathroom doing the nasty. And that would be the end of it, except for a certain event which brings the brothers even closer to each other.

Before you know it, one brother is chasing the other; guns are fired; several cars (and a horse) are stolen; there's at least one murder, a couple of more shootings and the newly svelte Dan Aykroyd as a crooked cop.

In general, just good, clean, wacky comedy fun in the style of the Three Stooges. Yeah. Two laughs and a couple of good chuckles are not in the style of the Three Stooges. Though Vincent and Keanu do the Larry and Moe to a tee, and Keanu does show a shade or two more of acting emotion than his usual less than one.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Eight Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price for Feeling Minnesota, he would have paid . . .

$1.00

And Levon Helm shows up for two minutes as a bible salesman. With Helm, Lindo, Aykroyd and Weld in the supporting cast, the buck is a bonus for the casting director, who did a great job.