DONATE to support the site

buy movie posters allposters
Buy Movie Posters

Books DVDs Kindle eBooks

buy Cranky gear!
Buy Cranky stuff

  the cranky critic (R)  is a registered trademark of chuck schwartz
Reviews since 1994: 
  A-E     F-N      O-Z    Posters       Who We Are and Why We Do What We Do    

CRANKY SEZ: Those that have followed this site for the last year or so have been privy to my descriptions of how the disabilities in my leg came about [from a neck broken three times roughly twenty-five years ago.]   My right leg is now disabled enough that normal walking can no longer be taken for granted. That plus the unfortunate fact that we can't sit for two hours a day, four days a week kind of gets in the way of doing this job.  We're doing what we can but, essentially, we've got to be down for a bit. We can't manage even one film a day in a four day, four movies released week. Disabilities suck. Once we deal with this, we'll be back.

The Cranky Critic®, since 1993. We'll be back someway, after Labor Day

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE: The Labor Day weekend was fine for a bunch of movies we didn't see 'cuz our legs aren't working. It wasn't a great box office – nothing released cleared $13 millions for the four day weekend which had the faith based flick, War Room ($12.550 millions/ $27.9 millions) swapping places with last week's topper Straight Outta Compton ($11.3 millions/ $150.2 millions) for the top two positions. Newbie A Walk in the Woods ($10.550 millions/ $12.6 millions) and a sputtering, but still strong, Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation ($9.300 millions/ $182.5 millions) follow. Newbie The Transporter Refueled ($9.000 millions/ $9.0 millions) took fifth. THE REST OF THE BEST:. No Escape ($7.032 millions/ $20.0 millions) drops Fourth to Sixth; newbie Inside Out ($4.544 millions/ $349.6 millions) is Seventh. The bomb that is The Man From U.N.C.L.E. ($4.445 millions/ $40.4 millions) drops Sixth to Eighth; newbie Un Gallo con Muchos Huevos ($4.42 millions millions) and Sinister 2 ($4.252 millions/ $24.6 millions) drops Fifth to Tenth

-------------------- New Releases --------------------
Fantastic Four

Fantastic Four brings a new team of actors and a new origin story to the Marvel comics franchise. It is not the disaster the Internet has been jabbering about but it isn't much on thrills, chills or excitement. In short, It isn't Fantastic. Cranky's movie review and wallpaper downloads

Ricki and the Flash

Meryl Streep and daughter Mamie Gummer star in Ricki and the Flash which we tried and tried and tried and tried to get in to see. Streep's a guitarist in a bar band, still got stars in her eyes with a full grown daughter. It's Streep. Just go see it. 'nuff said.

the gift

We don't cover horror things because we're just too damned old but The Gift is doing heavy TV advertising as a psychological thriller so, sorry, you're on your own.


Mission Impossible Rogue Nation wasn't reviewed because Paramount won't let us see their movies. Like it ever needed reviews . . .

Straight Outta Compton

Cranky's an old white guy who spent most of his career in rock and roll radio.So, Straight Outta Compton a hip-hop movie? That, plus the fact that we haven't been able to sit up straight for most of the last six weeks and, well, we're pretty much over.


Ant-Man stars Paul Rudd and if you've got a young family this Marvel movie is for you. There are enough movies(s) here to us (meaning yours Cranky) pause but we're old and single. Cranky's movie review. Grown up daters should go to the film on the right --->

wallpaper downloads here


Trainwreck stars television name Amy Schumer. Missing this film because of ongoing physical crap was pretty much where I have to my foot down... on myself. I can't physically do this job anymore to the extent that it needs to be done right to do right by what readers are left.

Mr. Holmes

Mr. Holmes stars Ian McKellan (ltd) as an aging Sherlock Holmes -- the film is set in 1947 and Holmes is just getting back to England from some time spent in Japan (press notes) -- finally to face the prospect of dying. We weren't offered a screening. We certainly wouldn't have passed on seeing it . . .

The Stanford Prison Experiment

The Stanford Prison Experiment (ltd) stars Billy Crudup as a University professor who recast 24 students as guards and prisoners in a jail cell environment back in 1971. This, say the notes, was a big deal and big press back in that day. We don't remember anything about it. [We were too busy trying to get into/ surviving college back then so it isn't a surprise that we don't know this story. No diss] Offered and we passed,

irrational man

Woody Allen's Irrational Man stars Joaquin Phoenix and Emma Stone and Parker Posey and some names I don't know. That Allen's name is on it -- a film about a big name professor at a small name college and who he gets involved with -- is enough. We were invited. We had to cancel due to yeah, you know.

Terminator Genesys

Terminator Genisys sneaked twice for public consumption but not for most online reviewers. . . which in this case is a good thing. The advance reviews (25% on RT) scream Bomb with a capital "B". It doesn't matter. The film will do well this weekend and then it will die.

Magic Mike XXL

Magic Mike XXL, on the other hand, doesn't have to be much more in the other direction . . . meaning buff dudes strip. Cranky's a straight dude who was put to sleep by the first edition. We passed on this one.


Amy, a documentary on the life of singer Amy Winehouse scored a remarkable100% Fresh over at Rotten Tomatoes. That means the fans of Ms. Winehouse loved the thing. Whether it is of any interest to those who are ignorant of her music is an open question.

jurassic world

Wallpaper Downloads
Cranky's Movie Review    
Easter Eggs

Inside Out

Inside Out is Pixar genius. If we could get the heck out of our apartment we would have seen it by now. Disabilities suck.


Star Wars: The Force Awakens -- The Good Dinosaur (Disney) -- Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice  --  The Man From U.N.C.L.E. -- The Walking Dead -- rational Man -- Cooties -- Shaun the Sheep -- Magic Mike XXL - Henry Gamble's Birthday Party -- Ant-Man -- Batman vs. Superman-- Star Wars Episode 7 (#2) -- Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice -- Fantastic Four -- In the Heart of the Sea -- Winter Sleep -- Do You Believe? -- Woman in Gold -- '71 -- Predestination -- Unbroken -- White Rabbit -- Black or White -- Space Station 76 --Frontera -- What If -- Catch Hell -- Land Ho! -- 4 Minute Mile -- The Prince -- Hercules -- Cantinflas -- The Longest Week -- Ouija --

War Story -- Hide Your Smiling Faces -- Perfect Sisters -- A Night in Old Mexico -- Gold Frapp Tales of Us -- Palo Alto -- Only Lovers Left Alive -- Stage Fright -- Moms Night Out -- Alien Abduction -- Ant Boy -- The Duke of Burgundy -- Fractured -- Jinn -- The Drop -- Liars All -- Bad Words -- 10 Rules for Sleeping Around --13 Sins -- 50 to 1 -- Cheap Thrill -- Odd Thomas -- Sparks -- Best Man Down -- Best Night Ever -- Beyond Outrage -- Need for Speed -- Tomorrowland -- Big Eyes --  Loitering with Intent -- Witching Bitching -- Spanish Lake --

The Signal -- Home -- Rage -- The Trip to Italy -- The Congress -- Goodbye World -- The Olivia Experiment -- Frontera -- If I Stay -- Step Up: All In -- School Dance -- The Kill Team -- The Sacrament -- Wish I Was Here -- Big Bad Wolves -- The Pretty One -- Cheap Thrills -- Kids For Cash -- Open Grave -- Brightest Star -- 22 -- Walking With the Enemy -- The Protector 2 -- Hercules -- Mistaken for Strangers -- Leave the World Behind -- Earth to Echo -- Finding Vivian Maier -- Edge of Tomorrow -- Jupiter Ascending -- Goodbye World -- Ida -- Beneath the Harvest Sky -- Home -- Borgman -- Wolf Creek 2 -- Rob the Mob -- Persecuted -- Rowdy -- Poseidon Rex -- Walk of Shame -- We are the Best -- No God No Master -- Begin Again -- Obvious Child -- Words and Pictures -- Alive Inside

Help yourself to lots of images from . . .

Fantastic Four
Inside Out
Mad Max Fury Road
Frozen: Fever
Guardians of the Galaxy
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtes
Batman vs Superman
X-Men: Days of Future Past
Amazing Spider-Man 2
The Amazing Spider-Man
The Avengers
Beauty and the Beast
Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Captain America: First Avenger
Cars 2
Conan the Barbarian
Despicable Me 2
Exodus: Gods and Kings

Star Wars Episode 7: The Force Awakens
Hobbit: Battle of Five Armies
How to Train Your Dragon 2
Kung Fu Panda 2
The Lion King
Man of Steel (Superman)
Red Riding Hood
Rio 2

The Smurfs
Sherlock Holmes

Transformers 3
Winnie the Pooh
The Wolverine


Dallas Buyer's Club -- Last Vegas -- Rush -- Cloudy with Chance of Meatballs 2 -- Jackass: Bad Grandpa -- All is Lost -- Best Man Holiday -- Ender's Game -- Dark Knight Rises -- Less -- Ted -- Amazing Spider-Man -- Prometheus --- Madagascar 3 -- Men in Black 3 -- Magic Mike -- Snow White Huntsman --The Avengers -- Amazing Spider-Man -- The Artist -- Three Stooges -- The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo -- The Muppets -- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy -- Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close -- Alvin + Chipmunks Chipwrecked -- War Horse -- We Bought a Zoo -- Fast Five-- Bridesmaids (unrated) -- Michael Flatley Lord of the Dance -- Thor -- X-Men First Class -- Rio -- Rango -- Unstoppable -- For Colored Girls -- Life As We Know It -- Red -- The American -- The A-Team -- Avatar -- Dinner for Schmucks -- Machete -- Zombieland

Dallas Buyer's Club -- Last Vegas -- Rush -- Cloudy with Chance of Meatballs 2 -- Jackass: Bad Grandpa -- All is Lost -- Best Man Holiday -- Ender's Game -- Ted -- Les Miserables -- Prometheus -- Madagascar 3 -- Men in Black 3 -- Magic Mike -- Titanic -- Jaws -- Star Wars IV-VI -- Twilight Saga: New Moon -- James Bond collection -- Snow White Huntsman -- The Avengers -- Amazing Spider-Man -- Singing in the Rain -- The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo -- Casablanca 70th anniv -- South Park season 15 -- The Descendants -- Adventures of Tin Tin -- My Week With Marilyn -- Melancholia -- The Muppets -- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy -- Alvin + Chipmunks Chipwrecked -- Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Pt 1 SE -- Super 8 -- X-Men First Class -- Big Lebowski -- Star Wars Saga I-VI -- Sucker Punch -- Lord of the Rings Trilogy -- Super -- Unstoppable -- Red -- The American -- The A-Team -- Legacy -- Legendary -- Machete -- Wall Street Money Never Sleeps -- Toy Story 3 -- Kick-Ass

----------------------------------------- DVDs FOR SALE -----------------------------------------

Flight -- Perks of Being A Wallflower -- Zero Dark Thirty -- Wreck-It Ralph -- End of Watch -- The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo -- Hop -- Footloose (2011) -- Hugo -- Tower Heist -- Jack and Jill -- Tower Heist -- The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 -- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy -- The Three Musketeers (2011) --My Week With Marilyn -- Abduction -- Contraband -- The Iron Lady -- Angels & Demons -- Joyful Noise -- The Rum Diary -- The Bodyguard -- Moneyball --   Cowboys & Aliens --Insidious -- Red Riding Hood -- True Grit -- Academy Award winning films -- Avatar -- Batman Begins -- Blade Runner -- Clash of the Titans -- Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon -- The Hangover -- Harry Potter 1-6 box set -- Harry Potter Half-Blood Prince -- He's Just Not That Into You -- How to Train Your Dragon -- Incredible HULK -- The Hurt Locker -- Ice Age 1 & 2 set -- Indiana Jones trilogy -- Indy/ Crystal Skull -- Inglorious Basterds -- Iron Man -- Iron Man 2 -- Ultimate James Bond v1 -- Ultimate James Bond DVD v2 -- Ultimate James Bond   v3 -- Ultimate James Bond DVD v4 -- Juno -- Jurassic Park box set -- Karate Kid -- Kick Ass -- Lawrence of Arabia -- The Last Airbender -- Night at Museum -- 9 -- Paranormal Activity -- Passion of the Christ -- Ratatouille-- Resident Evil Afterlife -- The Runaways -- Scott Pilgrim -- Sherlock Holmes -- Shrek 1-3 trilogy -- Sin City -- Simpsons Movie -- Slumdog Millionaire -- Spider-Man Trilogy -- Star Trek I - VI box set -- Star Trek 2010 (1 disk) -- Star Wars Trilogy (1-3) -- Star Wars Trilogy (4-6) -- Terminator Salvation -- The Town -- Toy Story 3 -- Twilight -- Twilight: New Moon -- Twilight Saga Eclipse -- Twilight Breaking Dawn pt. 1 -- -- Up -- Wall-E -- Wall Street Money Never Sleeps -- Who is Harry Nilsson? -- Woodstock 49th anniv -- The Wrestler -- X-Men Trilogy -- X-Men Origins: Wolverine -- X-Men Trilogy

---------------------------------- BLU-RAY DISCS FOR SALE ----------------------------------
The Artist -- Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol -- Spawn -- The Hunger Games -- Sherlock Holmes A Game of Shadows -- JAWS -- 21 Jump Street -- Singing in the Rain 60th Anniv) -- The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo, Happy Feet Two, Footloose (2011), Tower Heist, Angels and Demons, The Rum Diary, Abduction, The Bodyguard, Moneyball, Captain America, Thor Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol, The Adventures of Tintin, Star Wars: The Complete Saga (Episodes I-VI) -- Lord of the Rings Extended Edition -- The Matrix box set -- Men in Black -- Alice in Wonderland (2010) -- Avatar -- Batman Begins -- The Dark Knight -- Blade Runner -- The Bourne Trilogy set -- Braveheart -- Breakfast Club -- Chronicles of Narnia -- Clash of the Titans -- Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon -- Fifth Element -- Forrest Gump -- Ghostbusters -- Ghost Rider-- Gladiator -- Goodfellas -- The Hangover -- The Hurt Locker -- Inglorious Basterds-- Hellboy -- Harry Potter years 1-6 -- HP: Order of Phoenix -- Harry Potter: Half-Blood Prince -- Iron Man -- Iron Man 2 -- James Bond Ultimate ed v1 -- James Bond Ultimate ed v2 -- James Bond Ultimate ed v3 -- Julie & Julia -- Juno -- Kill Bill 1 & 2 -- Kung Fu Panda -- Live Free or Die Hard -- Michael Jackson This is It --   Ocean's 11 12 13 set -- Passion of the Christ --  Pirates: Dead Man's Chest -- Pirates: At World's End -- Rambo box set -- Sherlock Holmes -- Sherlock Holmes A Game of Shadows -- Shine a Light (Stones Live) -- Silence of the Lambs -- Sleeping Beauty -- Spider-Man Trilogy HD -- Star Trek films set -- Star Trek (2009) -- Star Wars box (1-3) -- Star Wars box (4-6) -- Superman Batman Apocalypse -- Terminator -- Terminator 2 -- Terminator Salvation -- Top Gun -- Total Recall -- Transformers SE -- Twilight -- Twilight: New Moon -- Twilight: Eclipse -- Twilight Breaking Dawn pt. 1 -- Up -- Wall-E -- Watchmen -- Wizard of Oz -- Wonder Woman -- Woodstock 40th anniv -- The Wrestler -- Wolverine -- X-Men Trilogy
buy Cranky gear!
Buy Cranky stuff
buy movie posters allposters
Buy Movie Posters

Buy Books
Buy Top Movies

dvd empire

The Cranky Critic® is a Registered Trademark of and this site is Copyright © 1994 - 2015 Chuck Schwartz. All Rights Reserved.
Images used on the site are ©™® their individual owners and used with permission.
Academy Award™(s) and Oscar®(s) are registered trademarks and service marks of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.